No Sympathy From Nazi Cop

Today I ran out of gas. Pathetically, yes. It was ultimately my fault, but several events conspired to make it a reality. And it happened. I had even been to two gas stations just before I ran out! Broken card reader at the first one, and a line at the second. I was on my way to the third gas station-- kaput.

I was glad I had just gotten Platinum Triple A, and called them posthaste. They wanted a street, I gave them the street. They wanted the cross street, I gave them the cross street. They put me on hold and called a "service provider" who got on the line asking for an exact address.

You see, the way my town is built, there are some sections of street that have no development, and therefore no address. I was stopped at such a place and told them so. The service provider said no address, no service. So I said fine and fuck you, got out and just walked to the nearest gas station. It was less than a mile, and they happened to have a gas can. So I bought that, filled it and started back to my truck.

About 500 yards before I got there, a cop pulled up behind my truck and put the lights on. Once I got to about 50 yards away, she (yes, it was a ladycop and she was still a dick) saw me walking up with the gas can, got out of her cruiser and yelled, "THIS YOUR TRUCK?" I waved and said yes. And she goes, "COULD YOU HURRY IT UP PLEASE?!" -- and I just fucking laughed. Here I am walking up in a damn suit and tie with a gas can -- and Officer Fuckhead wants me to, what, RUN?! You've got to be kidding me.

Then she goes, "You could have pushed it off the road."

To which I pointed out, "It's uphill, officer."

Dick.